Considering Safety in Situations Involving Domestic Violence and Abuse

In an abusive close relationship, there is always a risk that the abuse may quickly become more severe and, in some cases, life-threatening. This is often referred to as the escalation of violence.

Abuse may become more serious and dangerous gradually over time or very quickly and unpredictably, for example during an argument. Even if there has been no physical violence in the relationship, the risk of it remains. Threats of physical violence also increase the likelihood that such violence will occur. The risk of abuse escalating into a life-threatening situation is particularly high when the abuse has involved strangulation, severe controlling behaviour and possessiveness, or threats involving a deadly weapon.

In an immediate emergency, it is important to call for help by dialling 112 or by attracting the attention of other people nearby, for example by shouting for help.

Protecting Yourself When a Relationship Ends

In abusive intimate relationships, separation is often the most dangerous stage because it carries a high risk of the abuse escalating. It is therefore important to plan the separation carefully.

For example, arrangements related to separation and moving out can be made discreetly without the abusive partner’s knowledge. It may also be helpful to ask a trusted friend or family member to be present when moving out. Another option is to stay in a refuge or shelter, from which practical matters related to housing can often be arranged more safely.

Sometimes the perpetrator seeks to continue the abuse after the relationship has ended. In these situations, it is important to continue paying attention to personal safety. The safety of any children and pets should also be considered, as the perpetrator may attempt to harm them. The perpetrator may also try to extend the abuse to people close to the victim or use them to gather information. For this reason, it can be important to discuss safety issues with family members, friends, and other trusted people.

When taking steps to protect yourself, it is important to consider physical, psychological, and digital safety as carefully as possible. Support services can help assess risks and develop a plan for improving safety.

The purpose of safety measures is to strengthen personal safety and support healing, not to take responsibility for stopping the abuse. Responsibility for the abuse always lies with the perpetrator.

Digital Safety

Perpetrators may use technology and digital services as part of the abuse. This is why it is important to pay attention to digital safety as well.

Digital safety means protecting the privacy and security of devices, online accounts, and methods of identification. This includes, for example, using strong passwords, locking devices, protecting personal information, making use of confidentiality or non-disclosure measures where available, and preventing unwanted location tracking.

An important part of digital safety is understanding the devices and services you use, including their privacy and security settings. For example, it is helpful to know which applications should be installed on your phone and which should not, and what smart devices are being used in your home.

As part of domestic violence and abuse, a perpetrator may sometimes monitor a victim’s devices using spyware or other forms of surveillance. If you discover unfamiliar or suspicious applications on your device, or if you notice unusual activity on any of your user accounts, it is advisable to seek further information, for example through reliable online resources or by asking for professional advice.

Digital safety involves many different aspects and requires careful attention. Detailed guidance on improving digital safety is available, for example, in Women’s Line Finland’s Digital Safety Plan (in Finnish), which can be used as a practical checklist.

Safety Plan

The purpose of a safety plan is to help a person experiencing domestic violence and abuse prepare for situations in which their own safety, or the safety of their children, may be at risk because of violence or threats of violence.

The aim is to encourage the person experiencing abuse to think in advance about how to protect themselves, any children, and, where relevant, pets during a potentially dangerous situation. When these issues have been considered systematically beforehand, it can be easier to act in an emergency.

A safety plan made in writing can be particularly useful because this important information does not have to be remembered by heart and can instead be checked when needed. However, it is important to store the plan carefully so that it does not accidentally fall into the hands of the perpetrator.

A safety plan may include topics such as recognising warning signs that physical violence may occur, identifying escape routes and planning how to leave a dangerous situation quickly, calling for help, and reaching a safe place. Ready-made safety plan forms and lists are available on the internet and can be used to help create a personal safety plan (e.g. RIKU, THL, Nettiturvakoti).

Considering Safety in Situations Involving Domestic Violence and Abuse

Read more about domestic violence